sttabbs!
stttabbs!
stabbbbbs!
stabbsbsbbbbsbzzzaaabb!

breaking glass and gun shots
falling dirt and crumbled rocks
zipper pulls and riled up jocks
ticking hands on grandfather clocks

(Chorus)
sttabbs!
those foley sounds
from sample banks
used by producer clowns

sttabbs!
when a word is not enough
you have to use a stab
so you can sound more tough

fung fu and earthquakes
revved engines and squealing brakes
basketball shoes and hissing snakes
drum machine cowbells that sound like fakes

(chorus)

celery cracking and bamboo sticks
tattoo needles and smashing bricks
that lapping sound when you're doggie licks
money counters for those rich ass pricks

(Bridge)
the light sound of an innocent laugh
champagne pouring and a bubble bath
how much mushier could it get?
oh, but you sampled porn from the internet...

synthesized sweeps, touch tones phones (sttabbs!)
modem squeals, and abstract tones (sttabbs!)
SID chips running secret zones (sttabbs!)
divas singing in their bedroom all alone!

(chorus)

videogame noises, and 80s toms
shooting soldiers under dropping bombs
ten thousand sounds on 10 CD-ROMs!
you give yourself away if you sample your bongs

(chorus)

(Syncopated ending)
low pass filters make lasers
electric buzzes from tazers
you know we're really trying
if we're sampling our razors

but hey! if the bass drop's low
and the record scratch isn't to slow
put a donk on it and go
filth moth and wrave, we know about
sttabbs! (echo..echo..echo..echo..echo..echo)